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          House Hunting in Wellington is so much fun.   About as much fun as contracting Yeast Infection or Oral Herpes.   Our landlord has decided to put our flat on the market, and we’ve been struggling to look for a new home, whether it be a rental or something to own.  With the influx of insane buyers this year, we are shit out of luck.   You’d have noticed my severe […]

BEEF & MUSHROOM MAZEMEN


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          According to the Basic Principles of Genetics, the genotype (made up of 2 alleles, one from each parent) is the set of genes in our DNA which is responsible for a particular trait.  The phenotype is the physical expression of that trait.  The Human Genome: A User’s Guide  further explained this with an analogy that uses a cake recipe to represent the genotype,  and the resulting cake as the phenotype.  […]

PORK ADOBO


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        When the occasion calls for it,  you just want to bake muffins in the shape of a farm animal.  Without having to resort to elaborate crafting.  I suck at crafting.  Nobody can be suckier at crafting than me.  Even worse are my laughable attempts at making something cute.  I don’t do cute.  Cute things hate me.  My delusions of cute produce horrifying results.  If there was a competition for such a […]

SILICONE ZONE: PIGGY MUFFIN MOLD


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        You know those free leaflets that grocery stores hang out front?  Smaller shops display them by the cash register too.  Often, they’re disguised as recipes, but really just crap advertisement for whatever product-of-the-week they’re trying to promote to the unsuspecting masses.  You’re more than likely to get junk that goes straight to the paper recycling bin.  But every now and again,  you do get lucky and come across an awesome recipe, […]

MUSHROOM PATE



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        Before 2015 ended, Mark and I decided we needed more gadgets in our lives.  He bought a Sony PS4 console, and  I got a compact folding digital kitchen scale.  I told myself this is so I can bake anywhere I go, be it in motels during NZ road trips or in long-stay apartments overseas.  While those reasons were valid and true, I mostly wanted the Joseph Joseph Triscale because it looked […]

JOSEPH JOSEPH: TRISCALE


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        Back in August, astronauts aboard the ISS ate the first vegetables grown and harvested in space.  Some time this year, Matt Damon seeded a makeshift garden in The Hab, a fictional base of operations in The Martian.  While the former event is exciting and anchored in reality – another leap for mankind, the latter is obviously Sci-Fi.  Knowing this didn’t diminish the thrill of watching Matt Damon go all nerdy botanist, […]

SKILLET FRIED POTATOES


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Recipe adapted from Coles AU           I kill plants.  Not intentionally, it just happens, like I’m some anti-vegetation deity.  Which really sucks because I’ve always wanted a herb garden.  Nothing extravagant, just some greens in earthenware on the kitchen window sill.  Unfortunately,  when you are the equivalent of the grim reaper in the chlorophyll-sucking world, any leafy life form within a 3-meter radius is guaranteed death.   I started off with a […]

MUSHROOM, BLUE CHEESE & WALNUT TARTS


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          In the 15th century, explorers circumnavigated the world in their bid to dominate the spice trade.  Killing, burning, and dismembering everyone in their way.   A history of violence,  just so they could make their meals taste better.  Yesterday, I circumnavigated the waterfront leading to Jervois Quay because I have no sense of direction.  Then, I discovered a new spice at the City Market.  The biggest danger I faced was […]

BOSLEY’S PANTRY: VADOUVAN SPICE



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Ensaimada con Queso, a soft and airy brioche enriched with eggs and grated Edam. Coated with buttery brown sugar, and smothered with finely ground Parmesan.         Life is full of complicated questions that are tough to answer.  For instance, is losing weight worth an existence devoid of sugar and butter?   I  see the appeal of having flat abs again, but my mental health requires bread and pastries.  Clearly, I need to evaluate […]

ENSAIMADA CON QUESO


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        After a week of eating soggy muesli and microwaved instant oats, I got a hankering for something, well, not soggy and not microwaved for breakfast.  And I don’t mean buttered toast.   As far as indulgences go,  my cravings demanded something savory and pretty to look at, yet easy to prepare.   Because as much as I throw around the word indulgences,  let’s face it, when you have very young children, any […]

MUSHROOM, TOMATO, HAM & SALAD GREENS FRITTATA


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        I suck at Arts & Crafts.   And I hate sewing.  Put a needle in my hand and I’m instantly a danger to others and myself.  To rectify this,  I signed up for lessons at a shop located at Marion Street,  a stretch of road where various business transactions take place during the day, and is a popular hangout for prostitutes hawking cheap thrills at night.   Didn’t go so well.  I spent […]

SPINACH, PESTO & SUN-DRIED TOMATO MUFFINS


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        It’s such a cliché question, bordering on boring, but if  asked what my dream job would be, I’d say a Condiment Spotter.  I’m fully aware that this line of work does not exist (what a low down dirty shame), but hey it’s my  dream.   Some girls gush over handbags and shoes, or funky tops and sparkly jewelry.  I melt and fall in love gazing at the most wonderful smoky barbecue seasoning. […]

THE VILLAGE PRESS OLIVE OIL



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